never give up

So just when I thought teaching was awful and any chance of getting into a decent school system an impossible feat I got a break. I've just added on a new school system to my list of schools that I substitute teach for. I feared would be just like the inner city district I work for  - schools filled with children who stab each other with pencils at will (see last blog for that story). As it turns out the new district is a really good school system and they are looking for a long term art substitute which is just what I've been wanting to do. I had an interview at another school system back in August where I was told that although I had an amazing GPA, great references, had a dual certification, and had student taught in a 2nd grade class I needed more art teaching experience in the form of a long term subbing assignment. I hope this works out...If not I've applied for about 15 other jobs. I have an interview today with a marketing group. It could work with my art background but lets face it - I am definitely not a corporate person. Then there is a career counselor position at a local college and a college recruiter gig at the University of Bridgeport (where I went to grad school) If they don't hire me it would be absolutely blasphemous. So here I am hanging on by a thread. I guess I'm just going to keep rolling. I wish I had this kind of fortitude back in high school -but that is another blog completely.

Substitute

Today was the worst day ever. I subbed in a 5th grade class in a semi inner city area. The kids were absolutely horrible and the whole day dragged on and on with me yelling through most of it. During social studies, about an hour before the day was over, two of the boys decided to stab eachother with pencils while I had my back turned. Of course I feel terribly incompetent but really what could I do? Shouldn't I be able to walk across the classroom to help another student with the classwork without fearing that 10 and 11 year olds will stab eachother? Long story short - one of the kids started crying and the other one (the stabber) realized he was in deep shit and started crying too saying the stabbee had stabbed him too. What a nightmare. I sent both to the nurse where they both got yelled at by the principal. UGH

I keep having dreams where I tell myself "You are unhappy, who cares if you have a teaching degree, who cares if you only ever work a job that pays minimum wage as long as you're happy, you don't HAVE to do this anymore."